Attack of the Pool Poopers

Andrew "Am I going to be someone's jailhouse bitch?" Harris is on the left, while Michael "Yeah I did it and I'd do it again" Cline is on the right

There are some acts that are so beyond stupidity that they cannot be attributed to mental defect, drug abuse or youthful idiocy.

Such is the case of these two morons, who were recently arrested for throwing their own feces into the huge swimming pool at St. Petersburg’s swankiest hotel, the Renaissance Vinoy Resort & Golf Club.

The two idiots in question, eighteen-year-old Andrew Harris and 19-year-old Michael Cline were captured on surveillance video scaling the fence around the pool and then, well, this quote from abcactionnews.com says it all:

According to a police report the video shows Harris  “deficated in his shorts, reached into his shorts and fling feces all over the pool.” Police say Harris then reached into his shorts, grabbed another handful of feces, dove into the pool and smeared it along the bottom of the pool in the shape of an “X.”

Both teens then climbed into the hotel’s hot tub where police found them a short time later.

Harris decided the best way to pull off this caper was to shit his pants? For some reason that has never occurred to me as the optimal course of action – particularly as the first step in my plan.

These two boneheads make me ashamed to be a white male, ashamed that I was ever their age, hell they make me ashamed to be a human being!

I can hardly wait to hear what their punishment will be. Stay tuned…

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2 responses to “Attack of the Pool Poopers

  1. Oh yeah…those drugs they give kids do no harm at all…right!

  2. I actually worked as a lifegaurd at a PUBLIC pool, and it is unbelievable how often this happens. We’re never able to catch anyone, but it is disgusting, especially when you have to “confirm” that there’s crap in the pool.

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