Zonies and Zonisms

When I moved to Arizona in August, my friend Richard Heene sent me the following advice by email:

“Zonies” are a little weird after they live there in Arizona for over a year. Drink beer and get disconnected in order to speak to them in a comprehendible way.

Richard’s perspective is always invaluable and inimitable.

Once informed that Arizonans are better known as Zonies, I decided to coin my own term – Zonisms – to describe the unusual things and behavior you encounter here.

For example:

  • There’s no such thing as cold tap water. Brushing your teeth in hot water is an acquired taste.
  • Arizona does not recognize Daylight Saving Time. When it was proposed in the 1950s one state legislator exclaimed, “This is Arizona. We don’t need anymore goddam daylight!”
  • Motorcyclists are not required to wear helmets because it’s so freaking hot in there.
  • Summertime pedestrians are practically nonexistent.
  • There are more birds here in the Winter than in the Summer.

I’m sure I’ll come across more Zonies and Zonisms as I go along and will happily share them as they appear.

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